VampireS Sumo

Guitar is a musical instrument strung with gut strings having a body with a flat back, graceful incurvarions etc. and for
playing, it is twanged by the fingers. It is called in French as guilarre, German as Guitarre, Italian as cijitarra and in
Spanish as guitarra. The construction of the instrument is of paramount importance in assigning to the guitar its true
position in the history of musical instruments, midway between the cithara and the violin.

Materials Used

The back and ribs of guitar are comprised of maple, ash or cherry-wood, frequently inlaid with rose-wood, mother of pearl,
tortoise-shell etc. while the sound board is of pine and has one large ornamental rose sound hole. The bridge, to which the
strings are fastened, is of ebony with an ivory nut which determines the one end of the vibrating strings, while the nut at the end of the fingerboard determines the other. The neck and fingerboard are made of hard wood, such as ebony, beech or
pear. The head, bent back from the neck at an obtuse angle contains two parallel barrels or long holes through which the pegs or metal screws pass, three on each side of the head. The correct positions for stopping the intervals arc marked on the
fingerboard by a little metal.

Strings

The real Sound ridges called frets. The modern guitar has six strings, three of gut and three of silk covered with silver
wire, tuned as, the thumb are assigned the three deepest strings while the first, second and third fingers are used to twang the highest strings. They are divided into two groups - Bass and Treble. The bass strings are thicker and have an inner nylon core with steel wrapped around them. The trebles are clear nylon and thinner. The thumb finger will more often twang treble strings than the Bass strings.

Types of guitars

1.Acoustic guitars

As long ago known from the history these are used by playing with hand. Though it is impressing many limitations are there
such as listened to a short distance, often note cannot be recalled unless the player knows the tab well. A great-sounding
acoustic guitar will be necessary but not sufficient condition to produce a great amplified tone.

2.Electric guitars

Electric players have known for fifty years that they needed to learn about more than just their guitars, and have made a
science of studying their pickups, amplifiers, cord lengths, impedance problems, effects devices, amplifying, miking
techniques, and even speaker and tube types.

Famous Guitars

Many famous companies make and sell guitars of both types. Remarkable of them are Gibsons and Fenders Guitars. There are many guitar centers which teach playing guitar. Online guitar lessons are also given in some websites. They teach guitar tabs (ie) tablature set of notations for listening and playing), bass tablature, guitar chords, ultimate guitar tabs etc. Some give even free lessons online.

Learning Guitar - Notations & String assignment

The notations are defined to the right hand fingers. While writing down the fingers are indicated by letters, i for Index, m for Middle and a for Ring finger. When written down the thumb is indicated by the letter p. This code is to do with the Latin
names for each note. { P = Thumb I = Index M = Middle A = Ring Finger } This can be easily remembered as PIMA.

The names of each string read from Bass to Treble as:

6-E -bass

5-A -bass

4-D -bass

3-G - treble

2-B - treble

1-E - treble

Open string preparation and striking

When striking or plucking a string the movement in thumb should come from above and through the string making sure that you
have a good solid contact with the string and a clear follow through. Your finger again should come from above but they will
pull backwards into the palm of your hand. A good contact is needed and again a clear follow through that does not collide with the other close fingers.

Stable right hand technique

Now try to rest the thumb on the D string when the fingers are playing and also rest each individual finger on its assigned
treble string. This gives a solid stable right hand position that isn’t floating in the air above the strings attempting to
hit a moving target. Your fingers and thumb should rest on the string waiting to strike. Make the transition smooth, so when
replacing the thumb back on the D string pluck with the index
and begin the trebles.

Practice

Often players have a slight lift and shake in their right hand that often limits the volume and security of your stroke, if you repeat this exercise slowly and listening for a good sound you will relax the hand and get a very clear sound. This is a technique of preparation and economy of movement that will take some time to filter its way into your existing songs and chordal progressions. It also will build a new technique and way in which you approach the guitar.

1.Take your time, don′t go for speed first, go for accuracy.

2.Go for a nice deep stroke and listen for a rounded tone.

3.Feel secure and balanced.

4.Remember you want a technique that is as simple and as stable as possible.

6TH String = P = E

5TH String = P = A

4TH String = P = D

3RD String = I = G

2ND String = M = B

1ST String = A = E

Try and go up and down the guitar nice and slowly try and keep your hand relaxed, this exercise will remind you of the feel
of the strings and how to approach the guitar.

Using standard chords

With your left hand bring in the chords of Eminor, Cmajor, Gmajor and Dmajor. Hold the chord for at least two repetitions of the right hand pattern going up and down the guitar. These chords require 6 strings, 5 strings and 4 strings to be plucked if we want the root note of each chord in the bass. This gives your thumb a different starting point for each chord. Remember to pivot through the changes in the left hand, try and link each chord to the next one. No fret buzz or sloppy timing between the hands. Complete synchronicity and always enough pressure to sound the note without buzzing,careful that you don’t put down to much pressure.

Repetition and speed of fingers

When playing music that is formed in single lines, e.g. a guitar solo, the melody of a tune a run or scale make sure that
your fingers alternate when plucking or striking the notes. The simplest way to approach this is to alternate between Index &
middle fingers. These fingers are set beside each other and are also strong fingers so they should quickly get used to this
type of alternation. The alternation gives a sense of rhythm and groove and will enable you to play twice as fast than if you used just your index.

Careful to always alternate index to middle. When playing the repetition of 4 or 2 this is easier than 3 or 1, the odd
numbers create almost a little skip as you cross the string, relax your hand and concentrate on shifting the weight from
finger to finger. Careful that you don’t bring your left hand to far from the fret board, keep it close in so each finger it
can be quickly depressed onto the strings. Tip of the fingers in the left hand at all times.

Things to remember while playing Guitar

Sit with a forward sloping posture by tucking your feet underneath a horizontal chair, heels off the floor. The easiest way to have a forward sloping chair is to place a piece of wood under the back legs of your chair. Avoid backward sloping chairs.

If you don’t like sitting with your legs tucked underneath, then just initially tuck your legs underneath until your upper
torso swings forward like a pendulum. You spine will reach a more natural curve. Then bring your legs back to the untucked
position by only moving your feet foreword; do not let your upper torso move back to a slumped position, although it may swing back a very small amount.
Sit with the entire body in a symmetrical position while still making minor movements and adjustments. Sitting well yet too rigidly makes for poor pressure distribution. Also, try wearing loose clothing as to allow for easier movement.

Place your music stand at horizontal lane of your eyes at a convenient distance for your eyes.

Have a nice day,Be happy.

Find more information about learning Guitar techniques from experts. visit :
mp3musicsongs.com/prod.aspx?prd=jamorama&src=blogwp Guitar Learning - Tricks and Tips

Pandithurai K, Software Engineer. Writing articles on music and music instruments.

Rocket Spanish is an Ṃ course available online and its bold sales copy would imply it represents the easiest way to learn Spanish. We are used to the hyperbole online these days, so this review will tackle whether Rocket Spanish is actually up to much and what you would actually be getting for your hard-earned money.

What is the sales hook with this course?

Rocket Spanish basically takes the same lead as many popular language courses of recent — interactive speaking. After the pioneering work of Michel Thomas and Paul Pimsleur, would-be learners realised that studying a second language could actually be fun and exciting.

In a nutshell, this means listening to dialogue, and then attempting to construe relevant answers and sentences. Many would argue this is the most effective way to learn language and the recent surge in language tape sales would suggest as much. Rocket Spanish’s course is on Ṃ, meaning you listen to it via your computer, or you download it to an Ṃ player such as an Apple iPod or burn it to a CD player.

Perhaps the most unique angle of the course is the online interactive service. As an example, you will be shown a picture of an object, and then given three options in Spanish to determine the correct answer. The same is also done for an audio option. The idea is that if you work your way through these terms and repeat, then eventually they will embed themselves in your memory.

How long is the course?

Rocket Spanish is a 31 lesson interactive course, which according to the creator should take you three months or less to complete. Also included are a large amount of printed resources to refine grammar and memorise vocabulary.

So what level of competency does it take you to?

Well, the course won’t take you to the kind of fluency and articulation levels you might expect in an intellectual, but it will drive you to a proficient standard. Assuming you tackle the course faithfully, there is no reason why you should not be able to hold fine and rudimentary conversations with natives of the tongue. Along with the works of men like Thomas and Pimsleur, this certainly provides one of the easiest ways to learn Spanish tongue.

An added bonus to this course, which I would struggle to find in many others, is the emphasis on pronunciation. One of the course’s main selling points is the fact that you will learn how to speak like a native, i.e. adapt your tongue for the different countries around the world which each embrace Spanish as their own language. Essentially this is “street-wise Spanish” as opposed to the formal education we might expect to receive in the classroom. It’s up to the individual to decide which method is more pragmatic.

The summary

Rocket Spanish is a fine overall course, but it lacks one special ingredient: living in a Spanish-speaking country. Mind you, we’d be harsh to hold this charge against the course as no such course could provide that unique experience.

I would heartily recommend Rocket Spanish to those who are willing and able to learn the language. However, ensure you have the diligence required — although three months of learning is a short time in the right context, it does require weekly discipline. I would suggest that having finished the course — if you have finished the course(!) — that you book a trip to a Spanish-speaking country as soon as possible and truly exercise what you have learned. Rocket Spanish provides an excellent springboard, but it is only daily and exclusive language integration with native speakers that can teach you to swim. Ultimately the easiest way to learn Spanish is an integration of both methods.

Hugh Campbell runs the Hottest Picks Online website, giving the best recommendations from around the web. If you would like to find out more about learning Spanish interactively, feel free to visit Hugh’s website at ( hottestpicksonline.com/LearnSpanish.html hottestpicksonline.com/LearnSpanish.html)

hottestpicksonline.com/LearnSpanish.html Rocket Spanish

Did you know that you can travel anywhere in the world in less than two hours, for less than $10 and without ever stepping out your front door? How? But, of course, through movies! Such “traveling” becomes especially more enjoyable when you are homebound, raising small children, on a budget, or simply without any vacation time.

How about a country you’ve never visited before? A country that for years was closed behind an iron curtain, inaccessible to visitors from the West—Russia? The movies that follow take you through the history of that magnificent country, showing you how Russian emperors ruled, lived, loved and fought, how Russian peasants worked, suffered, and rebelled, how Russian artists saw their country in colors, sounds and words, and how Western directors saw Russia as the unknown enemy that had to be penetrated with spies, intelligence, and drastic measures.

So, why not cook a Russian recipe, make some strong tea, rent a couple of these movies and invite your family to a real journey you’ll never forget? Expand your horizons together, as you explore a new culture in your own living room.

And, the movies are:

A. Historical Dramas by Russian Directors

Benefits: You will travel through Russian History, meet the Czars, and watch the revolution.

1. Aleksandr Nevskiy (Sergei Eizenshtein, 1938) It is the 13th century, and Russia is overrun by foreign invaders. A Russian knyaz’, or prince, Alexander Nevskiy, rallies the people to form a ragtag army to drive back an invasion by the Teutonic knights. This is a true story based on the actual battle at a lake near Novgorod.

2. Ivan the Terrible, Part I (Sergei Eizenshtein, 1945) In 1547, Ivan IV (1530-1584), archduke of Moscow, crowns himself Tsar of Russia and sets about reclaiming lost Russian territory…

3. Ivan the Terrible, Part II: The Boyars’ Plot (Sergei Eizenshtein, 1958) Having lost his wife to poisoning and deserted by his chief warrior, Kurbsky, Ivan is lonely as he pursues a unified Russia with no foreign occupiers…

4. Russian Ark (Aleksandr Sokurov, 2002) A 19th century French aristocrat, notorious for his scathing memoirs about life in Russia, travels through the Russian State Hermitage Museum and encounters historical figures from the last 200 years.

5. Ten Days that Shook The World (Grigori Aleksandrov, 1927) In documentary style, events in Petrograd are re-enacted from the end of the monarchy in February of 1917 to the end of the provisional government and the decrees of peace and of land in November of that year.

B. Masterpieces by Russian Directors

Benefits: If you love art, through these movies you will watch poetry in images and paintings in motion. These motion pictures explore the lives of certain Russian artists and describe how their spiritual quest leads them from suffering to redemption. You will meet some extraordinary Russian poets, artists, philosophers and open a dialogue with them that will stretch your mind and give you new perspectives about life.

1. The Color of Pomegranates (Sergei Parajanov, 1968) A biography of the Armenian troubadour Sayat Nova (King of Song) reveals the poet’s life more through his poetry than a conventional narration of important events in his life.

2. Shadows of Our Ancestors (Ivan Parajanov, 1964) A Carpathian medieval legend about the tragic story Ivan and Palagna. A visual masterpiece.

3. Andrei Rublev (Andrei Tarkovsky, 1969) This epic charts the life of the great icon painter through a turbulent period of 15th Century Russian history, a period marked by endless fighting between rival Princes and by Tatar invasions.

4. Nostalghia (Andrei Tarkovsky, 1983) A poetic piece of magic realism, this is the story of The Russian poet Gortchakov who, accompanied by guide and translator Eugenia, is traveling through Italy researching the life of an 18th century Russian composer.

5. The Sacrifice (Andrei Tarkovsky, 1986) Alexander, a journalist and former actor and philosopher, tells his little son how worried he is about the lack of spirituality of modern mankind. In the night of his birthday, the third world war breaks out.

C. Foreigners in Russia through the Eyes of Russian Directors

Tender, trying and tragic, these films are also stories of passion, courage, and surrender to a fate one cannot control.

Benefits: They will inspire you to appreciate the freedom you are enjoying and be thankful for living in a democratic and peaceful society.

1. A Chef in Love (Nana Dzhordzhadze, 1997) The story of Pascal Ichak, a larger-than-life French traveler, bon vivant, and chef, who falls in love with Georgia and a Georgian princess in the early 1920s.

2. The Barber of Siberia (Nikita Mikhalkov, 1998) Richard Harris stars as a foreign entrepreneur, who ventures to Russia in 1885 with dreams of selling a new, experimental steam-driven timber harvester in the wilds of Siberia.

D. Russia through the eyes of American and European Directors

These movies offer a kaleidoscope of tragic and heroic human stories that happen at different moments in Russian history, as seen through the eyes of American, English and French directors.

Benefits: If you love history, drama, and literature, these movies will educate you through images and dialogue, while also keeping you entertained. You will learn about periods in American and Russian history you may not know about, and you will get a glimpse into the politics and ideals of Russia as they evolved through the centuries.

1. Onegin (Martha Fiennes, 1999) In the opulent St. Petersburg of the Empire period, Eugene Onegin is a jaded but dashing aristocrat who breaks the heart of young, innocent Tatiana.

2. The Brothers Karamazov (Richard Brooks, 1958) Ryevsk, Russia, 1870. Tensions abound in the Karamazov family. Acts of violence lead to trials of honor, conscience, forgiveness, and redemption. Based on the famous novel by Fyodor Dostoyevsky.

3. Doctor Zhivago (1965) A Russian epic, the movie traces the life of surgeon-poet Yury Zhivago before and during the Russian Revolution. Based on Boris Pasternak’s novel.

4. The Reds (Warren Beatty, 1981) John Reed, a radical American journalist becomes involved with the Communist revolution in Russia and hopes to bring its spirit and idealism to the United States.

5. East - West (Regis Wargnier, 1999) June 1946: Stalin invites Russian émigrés to return to the motherland. It’s a trap: when a ship-load from France arrives in Odessa, only a physician and his family are spared execution or prison. He and his French wife (her passport ripped up) are sent to Kiev. She wants to return to France immediately; he knows that they are captives and must watch every step…

E. Films about the Cold War

Entertaining, suspenseful and intelligently done, these films give insights and make comments about the tension between the U.S.A. and the U.S.S.R. during the Cold War.

Benefits: You will be entertained but also challenged to think about how the struggle of power in political games affect the lives of everyday people. Thankfully, the Cold War is over and no major catastrophe happened while it was going on. This is a reminder that piece is always better than war and, therefore, worthy to pursue.

1. Doctor Strangelove (Stanley Kubrick, 1964) Air Force Colonel Jack Ripper goes utterly mad and sends his bomber wing to destroy the U.S.S.R. He suspects that the communists are conspiring to pollute the “precious bodily fluids” of the American people. An incredibly innovative and intelligent film, it is also a satire of the paranoia that characterized the Cold War.

2. The Manchurian Candidate (John Frankenheimer, 1962) A former Korean War POW is brainwashed by Communists into becoming a political assassin. But another former prisoner may know how to save him

3. Fail-Safe (Sidney Lumet, 1964) American planes are sent to deliver a nuclear attack on Moscow, but it’s a mistake due to an electrical malfunction. Can all-out war be averted?

4. From Russia with Love (Terrence Young, 1963) James Bond, 007, is sent on a mission to Istanbul to try and acquire a Russian cipher machine—known as Lektor—from a defecting Russian agent.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Maria Grace, Ph.D., is an expert at teaching people how to learn lessons from popular movies to find the job, home, relationship, and healthy body and mind they want. She is a Fulbright scholar, licensed psychotherapist, sought-after public speaker and coach, and the author of “Reel Fulfillment: A 12-Step Plan for Transforming Your Life through Movies” (McGraw-Hill, 2005). “Reel Fulfillment” was praised by Publisher’s Weekly as one of the top “self help books out of the self-help box” for 2005-2006.

For more information visit mariagrace.com mariagrace.com and reelfulfillment.com reelfulfillment.com

Your Monitor Lies!!!!

Don’t be offended. It’s nothing personal. Mine lies and so does
everyone else’s. “Fine,” you may be saying, “But what the heck does this have to do with me and my digital photography?”

A lot because what this means is that the image that you see on
your monitor may very well not be the exact same image you see when you print it out. I’m not going to get into the technical reasons of why this happens, but will focus only on what this means for us and our efforts to get dazzling digital photographs.

Let’s start from the beginning. You are looking at a picture on
your computer monitor and it looks a little too dark. So you use
some digital-editing software or the tools provided on the online
photo sites to lighten the image up a bit. You do a couple of
things, and voila, it the picture looks perfect and
magnificent….Well, it does on your monitor, but would it look as good on another monitor, or even more importantly, in a printed picture.

Monitors are by nature unstable. The same image viewed on two
different monitors may appear very different, though in print, the image would be the same.

So that means that the picture that appeared a little dark may have been, in reality, find and that by lightening it up, you actually made the picture worse. You see what I’m saying here?

You can really see this you see by taking a regular print picture, scanning it and comparing the print picture with what you see on the monitor. You can then take it the final step by printing the digital picture, and then comparing all three–the two pictures and the digital image on the monitor. Side-by-side, you’ll definitely see some differences.

I know this is crazy, and it is without a doubt one of the Most
Maddening aspects of working with digital photographs.

Now don’t get me wrong, in many cases the differences are slight
(though in others they may be more pronounced.) But a real problem is seeing a problem with an image on your monitor that doesn’t actually exist, correcting it, and then discovering that the correction actually worsened the picture.

Professional graphic artists often spend thousands of dollars on
software to calibrate their monitors–making sure that what they see on the computer is what they’ll get when they print. Even then, they will always get a printed sample just to make sure that the colors are right.

Fortunately, you don’t have to spend thousands or hundreds of
dollars to calibrate your monitor to a level more than suitable for our purposes. What I use and recommend is a small program available with Adobe Photoshop Elements 4.0. If anyone is not familiar with this software or company, they are both great. Adobe is the premier graphics and photo editing software company. In fact, Adobe’s Photoshop is the premier software package. Elements is the company’s slightly less professional version, and the one that I use. There is more packed into it then you’ll ever need.

One of the nice things they include is a calibrating wizard called “Adobe Gamma,” which, after installing the program, is available through your control panels. After the wizard walks you through the process, the program allows you to see what your monitor looked like before and after the calibration. Even though the change may be slight, you’ll be surprised by the difference.

I strongly recommend this software. Besides Gamma, it allows you to do so many other great and easy things to dramatically improve your photos. (We will discuss some of those methods in future
articles.) You can buy a copy of Elements amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B000AP89JE/dazzlingdigit-20/ here.

There are, of course, other calibration options available and you
can search for them in Google under “monitor calibration.”

The main thing is just to recognize that your monitor lies and just to be sure that any changes you make to your images are ones that improve.

Andrew is a former journalist and like many others in their mid-thirties still trying to figure out what he wants to do when he grows up. At the same time, he loves to capture “moments” and tell stories through photos. He is the creator of dazzlingdigitalprints.com/ht.php?a=dazzlingdigital&b=EZṹHME DazzlingDigitalPrints.com - a web site packed with tips, reviews, advice and newsletter all to help you get best digital prints possible.

[St. Paul, Minnesota; 1960] “I cleaned under the porch, grandpa, as you said you said yu’d pay me four-dollars…? I cleaned it all this morning.”

“Yu dats god dn aldedy yaw…!” said Grandpa with is ornery Russian rustic voice.

He stood looking at me, kind of staring, not sure as usually if (the Old Russian Bear) if he should believe me.

“…vat you gwin do ef dat rat comes git out, dis crap al-here?”

“You dont think its clean, grandpa?” I said.

He looked at me with that annoyed gaze, kind of a wanting to eat me up look, I was thirteen then, and I think he liked my older brother Mike much more than I, but then I could annoy people I suppose, and for some reason Mike didn’t or so he had me believe.

“I guess I better clean it again!” I said to Grandpa, watching him check under the porch as if it was the Taj Mahal. Then, as he pulled his body out and up, from under the porch he said, “noa..noa, No! I clen my self…” and he mumbled something else, I couldn’t make it out, a ramble that is; as usual. He stood up looked at me (a serious face now), “dat no good—loks…vike…shit!” Old Grandpa had a hard time speaking English, but he knew them swear words perfect, every letter came out of his mouth flawlessly.

In any case, I left him alone for the afternoon, he’d pay me later I told myself, he was a complainer—moody at times, and this was one of those times; but his word was like gold, if he said he’d pay, he’d pay. I found a softball game going on and joined in, in the empty lot next to our house.

[4:30 PM] Mom had called Mike and I for supper; her voice would echo across the large empty lot, and down Cayuga Street: “OHHHH…Mi…cooo clll—Oh…Chick…time for dinner,” and she’d do the same when twilight came about. It got to the point, we both [my brother and I] felt a little embarrassed that the whole neighborhood heard her calling us; that is as we got older and deep into our teens.

And when I got in for dinner that evening, we had pork chops on the table, and brownies. She cooked pork chops a lot; hamburgers with crushed onions in the hamburger, a lot of chopped onions, with apple crisp pie.

Grandpa saw me eating, and mom was walking back and forth from the kitchen to her bedroom (along side of the dinning room), and crossing through the dinning room, she saw Grandpa in the living room by the T.V. pacing to and from the porch, mumbling “Vat I got to pay, hit I clen the crp out me-sef…” he looked at mom, said, ‘…her, gie to Chick,” it was four dollars for the cleaning: then he went back to his not so good language, “Gd dmn, sn bith, do evy ding me-slf…” on and on and on he went with such language.

Then he went out to the screened in porch, fixed his pillows on the sofa he had out there, and put his pipe in a standup ashtray, and laid down on the coach, as he did so often, in the heat of the summer, and fell to sleep.

See Mr. Dennis Siluk’s books at your local internet book dealers, such as bn.com bn.com or amazon.com amazon.com

Everyone has their favorite story to tell, and this is one of my favorite stories because it involves two things that are near and dear to my heart! Both are my passions…humor and creativity. There are times when I TRY to make somebody laugh…and, there are times when it just happens because of circumstances. This is one of those occasions…

I do most of my walking/jogging at a local park, and I was just finishing up one sunny afternoon, and I was walking back to the car. On the way back, I noticed a man in a wheelchair heading in my direction. I was at the back of the car, with the trunk open, where I put my running shoes and sweats in the trunk. I noticed the man in the wheelchair approached me in a slow manner.

When he got where I was, we exchanged pleasantries and he stopped to chat for a while. We talked for a few minutes, and then I noticed a big grin on his face. I had no idea what he was smiling about, as it must have been something I said was funny during our conversation. I noticed that he was looking at my license plate…pointed at it and said, “Your personalized license plate is funny! How did you come up with the idea for it?”

My personalized license plate reads: “SLOWPOK.” So, I explained to the man how it came about.

The speed limit is 55 miles an hour in many places and being the good and model citizen that I am (yeah, right), I don’t drive over the speed limit! But, there are the ever-present road hogs, who don’t obey the laws and drive 65…75…85 miles an hour, and have no consideration for others!

Anyway, I explained to the man, that because I’m a slow driver (and model citizen), other drivers come up behind me and are impatient with me. I can see the hate in their eyes in the rear-view mirror! They sometimes throw a fist or a finger my way or yell at me to speed it up, etc. They usually race around me like I’m standing still. You know the type…road hogs, with no respect for others!

So, I told the man that…at the time…I already had a personalized license plate on my car, but that I didn’t like. I wanted to change it, but I couldn’t think of what to put in its place, etc. Personalized license plates can be tough to produce, because there are only seven characters or less that can be used. So, to do this, takes a little thinking and effort and imagination. (And, that’s one thing I’ve never done well…THINK)

As I continued telling the man my story…I was driving along on the freeway one day, and there was a fellow driving a truck behind me, and he came right on top of my rear bumper! I thought he was going to hit me, and I was upset about it! I kept watching him in my rear-view mirror! I could see in his eyes the hate because I was going so slow! (you know the type) But, because I’m a model citizen, and never break the law (yeah, right), I shook a fist at him, and said to him in the rear-view, “Okay, bucko, so I’m a slowpok…why don’t you just go around me, stupid!”

After I said that to the other driver, I said to myself, “That’s it…SLOWPOK…that’s what I want on my license plate!” And, that’s how the story came about! I told the man in the wheelchair, that I had the license plate for about seven years, and that I have had a lot of fun with it. He continued to smile! It’s my little disclaimer for rude and inconsiderate drivers, I told him! The road hogs, see my license plate and they race around me, etc.

I’ve always loved personalized license plates, and the creativity and ingenuity that people display in them, and a few I can remember are: GOMPA; HOTDOG; LEMON; DOINOK; PAIDFOR, FLOSS, etc.

The man was quite disabled…not only was he in a wheelchair, but his right arm seemed to be useless. There are some people on this Earth, who have been dealt a terrible hand in life, and this man is one of them! I feel sorry for all those who are challenged. As we parted our ways, I wished him the best, as he then struggled, with his wheelchair, across the parking lot. I’ve just glad I had a chance to put a smile on his face that afternoon. He made my day, and I hope I made his day, as well.

My Author’s Den: Here, you can get additional information about where my articles have been published (35 websites), and the latest news, etc. authorsden.com/visit/viewnews.asp?AuthorID=10885&id-14589 www.authorsden.com/visit/viewnews.asp?AuthorID=10885&id-14589
Website name: humordoctormd - Over 200 colorful pages over 500 graphics
humordoctormd.homestead.com humordoctormd.homestead.com
email; mailto:humordoctor@aol.com humordoctor@aol.com - mailto:humordoctormd@yahoo.com humordoctormd@yahoo.com
Copyright; Jerry Aragon (The Humor Doctor); 2006

The burial of the poor was the responsibility of the local parish Church and it wasn’t always done very kindly but sometimes there was good reason for it.

When a death took place in the Parish and there were no friends willing or able to pay the expenses of a funeral then it fell to the Kirk (Scottish for “Church”) Session to dispose of the body. In such an emergency the Kirk Treasurer was authorised to pay for a “Kist” (Coffin) the cost of which varied but did not exceed a few shillings as the minutes indicate. In 1745 the cost is stated at 4 shillings (20 pence) for adults and 2 shillings (10 pence) for juveniles. In earlier times bodies were not coffined at all but simply wrapped in a sheet or shroud and so put into the ground. This custom survived in some parts of Scotland down to the passing of the Poor Law in 1654. But so far as one can judge it was not reverted to at South Leith excepting under special circumstances. Thus in the plague of 1645 the Kirk Session ordained “ nane to gait dead kysts but those who are able to pay for them”. This was a practical measure due to the shortage of money and timber and necessary to bury the bodies quickly due to the plague which needless to say was extremely dangerous.

Later the common Bier is mentioned in the records and was sometimes called “the common mort kist” and according to the traditionary account this Parish (South Leith Parish Church) coffin was a closed box with the lid or one of its sides hung on hinges so that the contents of the coffin could be emptied into the grave. When the Poor Law camr into force in the 19th century the poor were provided with a coffin at public expense. There is a tale regarding a west-country parish where the burdens imposed by this Act were considered too generous to be borne and a Geddes Committee was appointed to suggest economies. The parish minister who possibly knew more about the subject than the other members on the board and perhaps had been reading his own registers suggested that a “slip” coffin should be used for the poor. This practical proposition however well meant met with opposition and was denounced by the public as a piece of cruel parsimony and the reverend gentleman went ever afterwards by the nick name of “Slip”

John Arthur is a local historian and Genealogist, married with two sons having websites at lineages.co.uk lineages.co.uk, leithhistory.co.uk leithhistory.co.uk and persevere.lineages.co.uk persevere.lineages.co.uk

Man Unbowed

Unbowed by sin, the world of man, stands
Upon his feet he gapes into the sky,
The indifference of centuries within his eyes,
And in his heart the curse of the old world.
Who made him dead to love and God?
A thing that breathes only for wants and needs,
With a lack of emotion, a brother to the fox?
Who tightened and pushed up his jagged brow?
(To make him look so grand, so proud—so tall.)
Who was it that produced his naked pulse?
Who sucked out his soul from its frame?

Is this the handy work Satan made and gave?
To have command over man as slave;
To have him chase stars that never reach heaven;
To have him cursed for time without end?
Is this the revenge he dreamed for God and man?
The one thrown out of heaven, into darkness:
Down to earths ground and Hades, Hell…?
There is no morbid thing worse than he
More greedy with condemning man to Hell’s eternity
More blind-hate with leaches and spells for mans fate—
More filled with demonic revenge for him.

What divides, is flanked by man and Satan!
Slaved to his passions, like a hawk to his prey
Are Jesus and the swing of Merlin, the same?
Who can save the soul from the dip of Hell?
The crack of death, the blackening of the tulips?
Through this peephole, the weary soul has looked;
Times’ misfortune is the rule of thumb;
Through this maze humanity has faded,
Raped, blasphemed and bequeath his birthright,
Tears and protests to the judges of heaven,
A protest that cannot be given much credence.

O Adversary, lord of the air, ruler of earth,
Is this your handiwork in place of God’s?
This atrocious world, deleted with God’s fragrance?
How will they ever come back to faith?
To live beyond the gates of heaven;
Give back to man his mortal upright light;
Construct in him, the lost hymn of life hereafter;
Leave out your shameful ancient evils
Tedious woes, and hurtful sorrows,
O Adversary, lord of the air, ruler of earth,
How will God’s wrath reckon with you later?

How will you protest in that doomful hour?
When the last trumpet blows, and shakes the world
How will it be for your henchmen in Hell?
For you have shaped the human-race, the way it is—
When this day comes, and man and devil tremble
In the sight of Almighty God, after the silence
Then, the terror of the world: what will you say?

#481 [2/11/2005]

Mr. Siluk was the winner of the magazine competition by “The Eldritch Dark [.com],” [a tribute to Clark A. Smith] for most favored writer[contributor] for 2004 [with readership of some 2.2-million]. And received a letter of gratitude from President Bush for his many articles he published in the internet magazine, “useless-knowledge.com,” during his campaign for president, 2004 [1.2-million readership]. His website: dennissiluk.tripod.com dennissiluk.tripod.com

Just four weeks until The Players. We’ve got to get through the Zurich Classic this week first. Don’t get me wrong, I’d love to be in New Orleans, now more than ever. It’s the golf that’s the problem. David Toms is the highest ranked player in the field (19th in the world ranking). Next is Chris DiMarco (35), then Steve Stricker (46), Lucas Glover (51) … you get the point. In case you don’t, though, Chris Couch is the defending champ.

Couch and Boo Weekley share something in common: they both chew tobacco. Weekley, who won last week with consecutive chip-in pars on the 17th and 18th at Harbourtown, was asked by the Golf Channel about playing in Maui next year. He said he’ll be there and joked, “Y’ain’t gonna see redneck surfin’, I’m sorry.”

Breath of fresh air, this Mr. Weekley, in the otherwise staid world of golf. Half the young guys on Tour seem to think they can wear personality in the form of yellow pants or pink shirts.

Weekley’s playing again this week, which gets me thinking about his chances. Remember early in the year when I was curious as to how players manage in a tournament following their first-ever win? And I found out, to my surprise, that (based on 2006 anyway) first-timers did pretty well for themselves the following week, one of them even finishing T2. Well, if you look at all winners from this year alone, and how they did the following week if they played (most did), you see even more striking results: T34, T48, T31, T19, 2, T9, T38, T28, T11, T27. Not a missed cut among them. Some respectable and high finishes in there. I smell me a head-to-head candidate …

But first, last week: Trevor Immelman withdrew late Wednesday. I had him in the outright and also in the head-to-head. That meant my chances for the week rested on Vaughn Taylor and Jim Furyk in the outright. Furyk missed his first cut in forever and Taylor looked good but couldn’t stay out of trouble late in the game Monday. He ended up T4. So, I lost half a unit on the week, bringing the season tally to -4.3 units for the year.

At this week’s Zurich Classic of New Orleans, take Daniel Chopra (40-1), 1/6 unit: He has to win some time. I just can’t see him being a DiMarco type of player—lots of cuts made, T25-ish finishes, lots of yearly money but little or no wins to show for it. I don’t see him that way because he’s much more talented than DiMarco and seems to be better in the temper department. Maybe his DQ last week for an illegal drop will have an inverse Mark Wilson effect and propel Chopra to his first victory.

Take Sean O’Hair (20-1), 1/6 unit: After a rough start to the year in which he missed a lot of cuts, O’Hair has gone T14, T14 and 7 (last week) in his last three. He didn’t play the Zurich Classic last year, but finished T14 in 2005. Still young, still lot of potential, I just wonder about drive.

Take Brent Snedeker (80-1), 1/6 unit: Snedeker’s making a living. He hasn’t slagged off since that 3 at the Buick Invitational, finishing out of T50 just once since. He’s coming off a T16 last week. As we saw at the Buick, it’s his poise more than anything else—he doesn’t think too much out there.

In the head-to-head, take Weekley to finish higher than Stephen Leaney (10-11), 1 unit: It’s true Leaney’s been playing really well lately (T8, T19 and 3 in his last three tournaments), but so has Mr. Weekley. Plus, the average finish of all winners on Tour when they play the following week this year is 24.7, and as I noted above not a one has missed the cut. If Weekley ends up in the top-25 this week, I like my chances in the head-to-head.

(All picks from willhill.com)

Jeremy Church is a documented member of the Professional Handicappers League.
Read all of his articles at procappers.com/Jeremy_Church.htm procappers.com/Jeremy_Church.htm

Germans wear ‘Lederhosen,’ drink beer and eat sausages, are always on time, humourless and cold blooded. The French eat croissants and baguette, wear berets and are lazy to speak another language. Italians eat Pizza and Pasta, talk loudly and are chaotic. Sweden is the country of Pippi Langstrumpf and blond girls. The British have a queen, love football and eat fish and chips. In Holland everybody wears wooden shoes, eats cheese and rides a bike through the flat countryside with its windmills. The Spanish enjoy bull fights, eat paella and take siesta while the Austrians live in the mountains, wear a “Tiroler hat” and listen to Mozart.

Many languages, many voices, many attitudes, many different opinions, national histories and cultures. What is typical European? A complex topic which is shaped by contradictions and conflicts. Nevertheless, thinking about Europe has a long tradition. It reveals a European self-conception and its dependency on the cultural, socio-political and ethical developments. But how is Europe going to look like? Is it possible to unite people from different countries and with different histories? Every country possesses its individual charm which they want to keep. But does an alliance of countries need to include containment or a decrease of consisting rights and situations? Should Europe not be a meeting point of different nationalities that are open for learning new languages and discovering the beauty of other cultures? A meeting point where humans exchange experiences and opinions, where you profit from each others heritage and learn to help one another to grow together to something bigger? European countries should not see themselves apart from the rest. People should discover that there are more advantages than open borders when going on holiday. They have to experience Europe as a community and a unit, not only in an economic sense. They need to see the positive effects and opportunities that are offered. Europe should not be just a point in the discussions of politicians but a project which is taken forward. It is nothing static but can be seen as “work in progress”. The only question is where to start. We all have different traditions, a different past and different climates and landscapes. We have different life styles and all speak a different language. How are we supposed to communicate? But is it really necessary to have one common language and one common tradition? Is being European not looking beyond our own nose and experience new things?

Times have changed, haven’t they? People are not spending their lives in one place anymore. They take their traditions and ideals with them and mingle with other people and their attitudes. That leads to a development of new commonalities and new opinions. Nowadays communities are mobile and mixed and not static anymore. You can find Italian and Greek restaurants in nearly every part of the world. Everybody eats French cheese and drinks French wine. Radios play worldly music and we learn different languages at school. We have to open our minds and see that we are not loosing anything from our history and our past but that we gain a part of another history and another past. But do we built up a unit or can we find a common identity if people in one country are already prejudiced towards each other? Take East and West Germany! After now 17 years of unification there are still conflicts and big differences in thinking and behaviour. We see that we cannot create feeling of a European community and force people to accept it. It has to develop by making clear that tolerance and a view on others are necessary and that Europe does not destroy the diversity of culture but tries to improve the interpersonal relationships. Somebody once said that Europe is a phase; it is progress, movement and standstill at the same time. It creates possibilities and chances. It is a feeling and somehow like a rainbow presenting a richness of different colours in one single thing or like a salad bowl where all ingredients are mixed together but still keep their originality.

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